theluckiest.net

#114; a year in limbo

A year ago today I moved from my old address to atlimbo. It’s been a ridiculous year; one of much more change than almost any in my life before, and I’m not just talking in the obvious sense. Yes, I’ve moved. Yes, I’ve left my day job for my dream job. Yes, I’ve made DC my true home in this world. But other than the big things, I find that I’m a different person than who I was a year ago.

From music-obsessed to political-minded, from scattered and scared to determined, ambitious. I don’t allow myself to be used in even the most insignificant ways anymore, having learned that the little things add up to what we are. I find myself settled into being alone in a way that I didn’t know possible, I’m content with it. I’ve sent most of my possessions – collections I was proud and protective of – 600 miles south and I’m okay without it all. I have no real space in this world that is ‘mine’ at all – my office is mobile, someone else’s apartment is my home. I’m still finding my way through Limbo, but I feel like I have some better orienteering tools than ever before and that alone is making the journey much less bumpy.

I used to believe that Limbo was this awful in between – this stasis between where we come from and what we want to be; however, I come back more and more to what I wrote about Limbo when I first arrived here: “It is neither heaven nor hell, solid ground nor airy flight.” Floating does not mean one is directionless, and looking back on my first year here at Limbo, I’m grateful for the soft landings, the dizziness, and the space that Limbo affords me. Another look at the last year after the jump…

I specifically kept this to solo pictures so as to avoid upsetting anyone who might have ended up in them, but here I am, Limbo. Just Limbo. Just a girl with finicky hair taste and the wrong taste in men, I’m good at fitting into my surroundings and love performing at almost any level (be it political or theatrical). Enjoy the snapshot; I know I have.

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